Blessed

I really need to shave. I mean, like 3 days overdue for shaving. I just left my razor in one of the many hotel rooms we've been in lately. I can't remember which one. But I really need to shave. Later today, I'll have a runner go out and buy a razor for me so that I can shave and look decent for the show tonight. I just got into the hotel I'll be in for maybe 8 hours and looked in the mirror and was reminded once again that I really needed to shave. And it got me thinking on how blessed I have been by this whole American Idol experience.

Sure, maybe it's because things are coming to a close: 3 more shows to go; in 5 days I'll be sleeping in my bed. So maybe I'm just a little reminiscent. Or maybe I'm just delirious because it's 4:36am and this weird schedule I'm on has me sleep for 4 hours, wake up go into a hotel room, take an hour to settle down and then to sleep again. Or maybe I'm just blessed.

I remember a year and a half ago, going to the grocery store and staring at razors trying to figure out which one I should buy because we literally didn't have the money to buy groceries, nonetheless a $15 razor. Sarah and I had made the choice for me to turn down several high-paying job offers over the years in order to continue to pursue this dream of mine. We were poor, hurting and trying to make the best of it. But it wasn't easy. Financial matters are the number one cause of divorce, and though you say for better or worse, when it's worse, all you can think about is surviving and that can come in the way of being a good husband or wife.

When we started this whole American Idol thing I was making $9 per hour. Over the course of a few months, I had moved up to $13 an hour, but that's hardly crazy money. We were living paycheck to paycheck. I would work 40 hours a week and the band would play 5-10 shows a month on the weekend. The band had made a decision to move over to the mainstream from playing churches and youth groups, places we were making great money to playing places where we were getting paid nothing. How Sarah ever put up with it, I don't know. So much work for so little money.

Then American Idol happened. I didn't know that much about American Idol. I didn't know if you got paid. I didn't know about the tour. I didn't really know anything. But it looked like a good opportunity. I didn't think I'd make it, but a friend offered to pay for the first trip down to Birmingham, so I took it, and now over a year later, I'm coming to the end of my American Idol run. Dreams coming true, money in the bank and eternally blessed.

I'm blessed because for the first time in my adult life, I have money. Not a lot of it, but I actually have money in the bank. I am by no means a rich man financially, but I have the ability to buy the equipment I want and need, I am able to buy nice things for my wife and we are able to make a move that we have wanted to make for years but never had the money in moving to Nashville. I will probably never be "wealthy" but for the first time we're able to be comfortable.

I'm blessed because I have the most giving, wonderful wife who I am truly undeserving of. But she was there before the whole American Idol thing. But this whole experience has caused me to really understand how much I appreciate her even more than before.

I'm blessed because I have come away from this experience with 9 great friends. Some closer than others, obviously, but 9 friends (10 if you count Shyamali) that I know will be lifelong. Phil and I will be living 5 minutes apart and Melinda is close by. In the fall, I'll be co-producing a project for Gina. Haley will be coming in and out of Nashville meeting with my management, trying to find the right fit for her musically. Rich and I are hoping to go see some NFL (yes, the Colts are going to kill the Broncos) together. Blake will always be my brother. I mean, to get 10 friends you love out of this is way more than I could've hoped.

Finally, I have intentionally created a culture with my fans that I hope can continue throughout whatever career I am able to have. There is a line between fan and friend that I think can never truly be crossed because of the distance between us. But I want for the Chris Sligh fan to feel as much like they are my friend as possible. That's what this blog is for. There have been some down times on the blog, there have been times of bad decision-making on my part on what to challenge. But we've found a place where we can come, hang out, have fun, discuss and simply be friends. And that's just the way I wanted it to be.

I am incredibly and inexplicably blessed.

And just some encouragement to those struggling. Without being cheesy. Without being over the top. Just know that the blessings are there already. The blessings are there for you plain to see, even though it's hard sometimes in the tough times. But stay the course...blessings are there and there's more on the way.