Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Copeland Farley

Copeland Farley was the baby that I spoke of in the post a few days ago that did not have long to live. After holding on for 8 days, she finally passed from this world.

Please keep my manager's family in your thoughts and prayers. The parents (my manager's daughter and son-in-law) are the same age as Sarah and I, so it has brought a lot of thoughts to Sarah and I...I can't even imagine the pain of seeing a child, especially one this young, pass away.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

Home

Well, after hearing that song at least 700 times over the summer, and having it bring back memories of my AI demise every time, I am finally home.

It's good to be with my brothers. My brother Jon is 26 and Allen is 19...they both live with Sarah and I...well, for 1 more week. Jon and I went to eat dinner with Sarah and I was able to eat at my favorite Mongolian Buffet. It was fantastic (though I think that the place we went to in D.C., Carmen, was the only place that has ever been better).

It's good to be with my puppies. L.G. & Tucker recently got fixed, so they aren't very happy with their mom and dad. Oh, well. I was tired of them peeing on everything. Well, actually, I hadn't really had to deal with it for the last year or so, but Sarah was tired of it and I talked her into allowing their nether regions to be altered.

It's good to be with my equipment. That's right I said equipment. Maybe I could say my stuff...maybe I'll just let that one go with a smile. Anyway, I have had the chance to get some fantastic equipment over the past few months and it has been waiting for me at home. So, my new guitars and new amps got a little face time with daddy today. We talked about the future and I made sure every one of them was tuned for rocking and then did a little classically-trained rocking out. It was fun. Though I was disappointed with 1 piece of equipment - a distortion pedal called the Metal Muff...I had read it could give a warm bluesy tone, but apparently all it does is Metal. And since I'm not really a Metal guitarist, I'm afraid it will end up on ebay very soon. Anyway, I was excited about that.

Finally, it's great to be with Sarah. In our house. Together. Not in a hotel. Not in the American Idol bubble. We stayed up late watching episodes of Grey's Anatomy that I downloaded on iTunes. We also watched a couple of episodes of It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. We don't have cable so I couldn't watch Monday Night Football (why, NFL, did you give it to a cable network?!!) It was probably better that I didn't because I was able to not feel remotely wussy by watching a chick show because my wife was in the room with me. Fantastic! A get out of jail free card.

Side note: I am pumped about the NFL this season. As always, I went through this last week and made my weekly predictions. This week I was 10 of 15 right...better than Boomer, right? Anyway, I love football. I love the NFL. I love Indy and can't wait to see them in the Super Bowl again. However, I should point out that the Super Bowl is going to happen in the AFC championship game, when Indy plays New England. Has anyone seen how great Moss and Brady are together? Holy crap! I hate the Pats, but Brady has never had a receiver like Moss and Moss has never had a QB like Brady. I'm saying this: if Moss stays healthy, he's going to break records this season...my predictions are 1700 yards and 20 touchdowns. He's 30 and playing like he's 25. But I digress. Sorry non-football fans.

It's 1:45am. I should be sleeping, but I'm still used to this crazy schedule I've been on for nearly a year. Stay up late. Get up early. I'm looking forward to tomorrow being able to sleep in. Though I'm pretty sure the puppies I love right now will be hated in 6 hours when they are licking my face to release their bladders somewhere other than my pillow. But hey, the glass is half full, right?

At least I'll be home.

Monday, September 24, 2007

Struggles and life

The last couple of weeks have been pretty tough. Obviously, the tour has come to an end now, and though I'm excited about the next stage of life, it's difficult to imagine life without all these people with me every single day. So, it has been difficult to say goodbye to this stage.

But even harder have been things going on in my "real life"...the life away from music and touring and career...even harder are the things that really matter.

My manager's daughter was pregnant and 8 weeks before the baby came, the child was diagnosed with a disorder that causes the child to be either stillborn or die within a short time of birth. They had the baby last week and, though the baby didn't pass right away, they have slowly watched a beautiful newborn child slip away. They think the child will die very very soon. Though I only know the parents in passing, over the last few months, I have come to love my manager and to see the pain it is causing him is tough to watch...and tough to empathize with.

I also recently received a call from one of my closest friends in the world to tell me that his family is going through a terrible crisis. I think that they will make it through, but it's tough to see a close friend have to go through so much pain.

So, please keep those two situations in your thoughts.

Finally, my wife and I are moving in a week. I am now officially unemployed. And October 2, I start an intense diet and workout program with a nutritionist and personal trainer. 3 incredibly stressful things are happening all very soon. So, please keep me in your thoughts and prayers.

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Blessed

I really need to shave. I mean, like 3 days overdue for shaving. I just left my razor in one of the many hotel rooms we've been in lately. I can't remember which one. But I really need to shave. Later today, I'll have a runner go out and buy a razor for me so that I can shave and look decent for the show tonight. I just got into the hotel I'll be in for maybe 8 hours and looked in the mirror and was reminded once again that I really needed to shave. And it got me thinking on how blessed I have been by this whole American Idol experience.

Sure, maybe it's because things are coming to a close: 3 more shows to go; in 5 days I'll be sleeping in my bed. So maybe I'm just a little reminiscent. Or maybe I'm just delirious because it's 4:36am and this weird schedule I'm on has me sleep for 4 hours, wake up go into a hotel room, take an hour to settle down and then to sleep again. Or maybe I'm just blessed.

I remember a year and a half ago, going to the grocery store and staring at razors trying to figure out which one I should buy because we literally didn't have the money to buy groceries, nonetheless a $15 razor. Sarah and I had made the choice for me to turn down several high-paying job offers over the years in order to continue to pursue this dream of mine. We were poor, hurting and trying to make the best of it. But it wasn't easy. Financial matters are the number one cause of divorce, and though you say for better or worse, when it's worse, all you can think about is surviving and that can come in the way of being a good husband or wife.

When we started this whole American Idol thing I was making $9 per hour. Over the course of a few months, I had moved up to $13 an hour, but that's hardly crazy money. We were living paycheck to paycheck. I would work 40 hours a week and the band would play 5-10 shows a month on the weekend. The band had made a decision to move over to the mainstream from playing churches and youth groups, places we were making great money to playing places where we were getting paid nothing. How Sarah ever put up with it, I don't know. So much work for so little money.

Then American Idol happened. I didn't know that much about American Idol. I didn't know if you got paid. I didn't know about the tour. I didn't really know anything. But it looked like a good opportunity. I didn't think I'd make it, but a friend offered to pay for the first trip down to Birmingham, so I took it, and now over a year later, I'm coming to the end of my American Idol run. Dreams coming true, money in the bank and eternally blessed.

I'm blessed because for the first time in my adult life, I have money. Not a lot of it, but I actually have money in the bank. I am by no means a rich man financially, but I have the ability to buy the equipment I want and need, I am able to buy nice things for my wife and we are able to make a move that we have wanted to make for years but never had the money in moving to Nashville. I will probably never be "wealthy" but for the first time we're able to be comfortable.

I'm blessed because I have the most giving, wonderful wife who I am truly undeserving of. But she was there before the whole American Idol thing. But this whole experience has caused me to really understand how much I appreciate her even more than before.

I'm blessed because I have come away from this experience with 9 great friends. Some closer than others, obviously, but 9 friends (10 if you count Shyamali) that I know will be lifelong. Phil and I will be living 5 minutes apart and Melinda is close by. In the fall, I'll be co-producing a project for Gina. Haley will be coming in and out of Nashville meeting with my management, trying to find the right fit for her musically. Rich and I are hoping to go see some NFL (yes, the Colts are going to kill the Broncos) together. Blake will always be my brother. I mean, to get 10 friends you love out of this is way more than I could've hoped.

Finally, I have intentionally created a culture with my fans that I hope can continue throughout whatever career I am able to have. There is a line between fan and friend that I think can never truly be crossed because of the distance between us. But I want for the Chris Sligh fan to feel as much like they are my friend as possible. That's what this blog is for. There have been some down times on the blog, there have been times of bad decision-making on my part on what to challenge. But we've found a place where we can come, hang out, have fun, discuss and simply be friends. And that's just the way I wanted it to be.

I am incredibly and inexplicably blessed.

And just some encouragement to those struggling. Without being cheesy. Without being over the top. Just know that the blessings are there already. The blessings are there for you plain to see, even though it's hard sometimes in the tough times. But stay the course...blessings are there and there's more on the way.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

9-11

Today is the anniversary of that sad day 6 years ago.

I remember I had worked till about 3 in the morning the night before, so I was fast asleep when my best friend called me. He told me to turn on my tv. Unfortunately at the time I didn't have a tv. So, my roommate and I got in our car and drove over to Circuit City and literally sat in shock as we saw the 2nd plane hit. Then in utter disbelief as the towers came down. I didn't cry, but I remember just sitting down on the floor of Circuit City, people walking past me in and out of the store, me staring at the tv with my roommate.

Anger, frustration at being helpless, fear that by some chance I knew someone marred by this tragedy...it was a day I'll never forget.

I think that this is that moment that everyone from this generation will hold on to and remember where they were when it happened for the rest of their lives. My parents and the generation before this do that with JFK. Sure, JFK seemed to hold the hearts of a nation...but 9/11 went straight at the heart of a nation.

I don't think the answer is war. I don't think the answer is hatred of a nationality or people. The answer is in understanding that this world is a dirty place. There is none good, no not one. It is by the grace of God alone that we are able to live in America, but it does not make us superior. It makes us lucky. We should defend ourselves, but love our enemies.

But most importantly, we must remember.